I am done thinking...

Since I've been on this Christian journey, I have always known that if I do what can and gotta do God will meet me half way. And for the most part, it has happened. I am always going and going, making sure my house is in order, constantly thinking of ways to get and stay ahead, and thinking and thinking. Now every blessing that has come, I always say, "Thank You Lord" because I don't want HIs favor to turn from me. I'm scared to live life without Him.

Now yes, it's true, if you do your part, He'll meet you halfway. Or even past the halfway point. However, I have been thinking and thinking and doing things to stay ahead until I’ve been doing more thinking than praying. So you hear the saying "Give credit to where credit is due." How can I give God credit if the things that are happening now are because of me? Of course God understands that I’m still striving to live right according to His word. But I have started seeing hell after hell.

At this point I can’t distinguish if it’s storms that I’m supposed to go through, or if I’m doing something I’m not supposed to do. I’ve been asking questions now like "If God won’t put more on us than we can bear, then why I feel like I can’t bear?" Or questions like, "God, are You mad at me?"

So at first I’m thinking (see there I go thinking), I’m thinking "Well, maybe I need to go into overdrive and started working harder. But it seems the more I try to work harder, the more hell I catch. So at this point, I give up. I give up as far as trying to figure it out. And immediately, I realize I need to go into prayer. And not just say a prayer, but to dwell in a hiding place and go into worship and to be in His presence. I got to go into worship and praise and set the atmosphere because whatever you need, in that atmosphere, things can change for the better.

So the point is, I'm not necessarily going to stop thinking. But there has to be balance between thinking and prayer life. Once cannot out weigh the other but depends on each other

So now, let me go, turn my music on, and began to go in war zone in prayer.